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OK, do you know the peak of my excitement so far today? Finding a shop in the market that sold the right kind of curtain hooks for my front room. That’s it. I’ve done fuck all work (there isn’t any to do), but I have ploughed through this month’s Bizarre and a few pages of […]

Cold and ouchy


Our offices are nice and warm. I’m sat wearing a polo shirt and I’m comfy. However, the toilets are fucking freezing. So cold that when you go everything nips up tight so it’s nigh on impossible to lay a cable. I think I came closer to laying nylon.

Hmmm… wonder if I could scoop […]

Santa? Useless bastard

All I wanted for xmas – the only thing I wished for – was a dead neighbour. It doesn’t even need delivering, so the lack of chimney’s no excuse. I mean, I wasn’t even fussy about how it happened. Fall out of a building, gas leak, pummelling by low-flying reindeer hooves. Anything.

But, no. The […]

Crappy banks… and revenge

OK, this isn’t on a scale with Colin’s issues recently but does relate back to something I posted ages ago. You know those useless bloody automatic answering services you get that ask you about every service except the one you want? Here’s another example.

I wanted to transfer a balance onto my TSB credit card. […]

Back to one of the old favourites…

They’re just shit. The whole Post Office is just fucking shit.

Package delivered yesterday, too big for letterbox. Of course, I wasn’t in because the post now comes at 10:15 instead of 7am. It’s my own stupid fault for having a fucking job, I know, but I wasn’t in.

Needless to say, the gormless prick […]