[another one written before I left home in March]
I had someone over recently and, being the polite host, asked if they wanted something to eat. "Cheese on toast" was the cheery reply.
Bastards. You invite someone over, show them common courtesy and they try and pull a practical joke on you. I mean, it’s all well and good asking a new apprentice to go and get some left-handed screws or a tin of tartan paint, but this could have been dangerous and knackered my toaster.
Had I not been as smart as I am, I could easily have been caught out. After all, how many people have sliced some cheese, layed it gently on the bread and then popped it into the toaster to cook? I’m not stupid. The cheese would drop straight off the bread and get all over the toaster elements. Fire could result and I’d certainly have to fork out for a new toaster.
Bloody irresponsible. That’s what I call it. Besides, I’ve already set fire to one toaster.