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The Eleven Types of Drunken Texts

[Thanks to Jo for mailing this]

1) The “fishing” text.This text is normally along the lines of: “So wot u up 2 later?” or “U out tonight?”, or simply “Oceana?”Despite appearing innocent at first, its intentions are far from it. Generally sent at around 3am, this should be translated as:“Im drunk, horny and haven’t pulled […]

Visiting the Houses of Parliament

All in all, it’s a bit of a ballache. In Australia, you just arrive sometime before 4pm and you get a nice, free guided tour for about 45 minutes. In the UK, there are different rules depending on where you come from, when you visit, what you want to see and whether you’re buddies with […]

UK government do something sensible… but don’t fucking tell anyone

It seems that from Monday, the legal age to buy tobacco in the UK rises from 16 to 18. This is a good thing. But as someone in the story points out, “only one in five 16 to 18-year-olds knew about the change”.

Likewise. I read the news every day when I’m able and at […]

Aw, fuck

Depressed again. Women… well, woman again.

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.

Why can’t I get her out of my fucking head? WHY?!

OpenOffice

I’ve installed this a few times recently for people who didn’t know about it. If that dodgy MSOffice CD no longer works, or the hacked keycode you were using to install it now causes Word to shut down every time someone on your network opens their copy up – what you need to do is […]