Avenue Q program- Front (Photo credit: yumiang)

Just for something a little different, we decided on a trip to see the highly-recommended Avenue Q show at the King’s Theatre in Glasgow. I’d originally seen posters up for it in London some years ago and happened to catch an advert recently detailing the performances up here.

For those who’s not heard of it, Avenue Q is an adult version of Sesame Street. It comes complete with fuzzy characters, monsters and songs. Thing is, Sesame Street didn’t have songs about homosexuality, porn and one night stands. Or if it did, I missed them.

Subject matter aside, this is a great production. The cast are, simply, fantastic. Not a missed line of dialogue or bum note the entire performance, and all this while operating the puppets.

It is an unusual sight to see the puppeteers on-stage alongside their furry acting pals. Rather than hiding behind walls, the cast run around in dark grey jeans and shirts moving and voicing the puppets. Clever positioning often allows one cast member to play two on-stage characters at once – one they’re controlling and one that another cast member is manipulating.

I did notice that the puppeteers also acted out their puppets’ parts – that is, as well as the voices they made facial expressions and so forth that matched the character’s mood. I don’t know if this is something they’re “supposed” to do, or if it just makes it easier to control the puppet realistically but it’s something to watch!

There are some very humorous moments, and the sound in the King’s was spot on. Often at theatres the sound just doesn’t work for less traditional musicals and the words in songs can be lost. Not so here, which is ideal as I’d say 75%+ of the story and jokes are in the songs.

I’ll be honest – I didn’t think it was as good as I’d been led to believe. The humour certainly kept me amused for the 2 1/4-ish hours running time, but I’d not say my ribs were aching by the time I left. Maybe on another night. On the other hand, I certainly wasn’t disappointed and time didn’t drag.

I reckon there will still be a few tickets left for this week’s performances in Glasgow and if you have the time and cash (and a gutter-level sense of humour) then there are worse ways to spend an evening!

Related articles

• Welcome to Avenue Q (onwardmanchester.com)

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Avenue Q

Safe

“What did you do, kid?”

Plot-in-a-nutshell: Seen Mercury Rising? It’s that with more violence

See it if you like: Statham fodder

The trailers for this looked OK, although it was immediately apparent it wasn’t an original plot. Mei (Catherine Chan) is a gifted child growing up in China. Her ability to memorise numbers is discovered by the Triad (I’m guessing – they’re never named as such) who decide that she’d be better suited in their working environment. So they kidnap her.

Jump to the US and we are introduced to the Russian Mafia, a host of corrupt cops, more nasty Chinese and our hero Luke Wright (Jason Statham). Statham pisses off the Russians so they make his life rather difficult, he’s been ostracised by the cops and he’s living on the streets. As luck would have it, though, he lands in a plum position at just the right time to get them both back. And the Chinese while he’s at it.

Acting as guardian to a runaway Mei, he kicks ass, shoots people, knifes a few, breaks some arms, jumps out of windows, drives insanely… hell, you know how action films go.

The thing is, this one has a plot. OK, it may be one stolen from an old Bruce Willis film but they’ve dusted it off well. After a brief flash of violence at the start, the film actually takes a while to get going as it works on the story. Once it kicks in, though, it kicks in hard.

The fight scenes are typically brutal, and Statham seems to be working more and more random objects into these sequences. It’s hard not to get the feeling that he’s trying to be a be-stubbled Jackie Chan at times.

Despite the short breaks for breath-catching, it flies along though never reaching the breakneck pace of the utterly mental Shoot ‘Em Up. It’s not a short movie, but it never seems to drag.

If you don’t mind your action films failing to keep count of the number bullets in the clip, this is one to catch.

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Safe

Well, that’s another one of those nice things ticked off a list. I’ve been to the northernmost point of mainland Britain, the eastern-most & southernmost parts of Australia, the southernmost part of continental Asia, the highest point in IndoChina (although I believe that claim’s disputed)… and now I’ve been to the highest point in Britain as well.

Thank you to all those who sponsored me and helped raise money for the St Andrew’s Hospice – a genuinely good cause, with lovely staff who did a great job in organising today’s fundraiser. With 200+ schoolchildren and staff scrambling up the mountain they made sure everyone was accounted for, shepherded and got home safe. Obviously, the Ben Nevis mountain staff also deserve thanks, as do the St John’s Ambulance staff and everyone at the Ben Nevis Hotel

Top of Ben nevis

who fed and accommodated us at the end of it all. And even let the staff have a free shower!

To paraphrase the great Douglas Adams – the first 1000 feet were the worst. And the second 1000 feet. They were the worst too. The next 1000 were no fun at all. After that I went into a bit of a decline.

Then it started to snow.

Only a slight dusting, but enough to make the stuff which had already been lying somewhat more slippery and the last couple of hundred feet more of a challenge. Up until then, I’d be taking a layer of clothing off every half hour. The sun was out, my balding pate was getting redder and sweat was running down my face.

That last little hike was probably the hardest purely as I had to spend as much time looking for footprints to stand in as I did making sure I didn’t slip backwards more than I walked forwards.

There isn’t a whole lot at the top other than a pair of stone… somethings and a tiny shack. And a great sense of achievement. Oh, and a corking view.

I made it up early enough that the clouds were only just coming in, so managed to see in all directions. The snaps (link at the top) should give you an idea of the incredible scenery on the way up and from the peak.

The journey down was no cakewalk either. As well as the skiddy snow, my legs were somewhat achey. The muscles I used on the way up were very different from the ones I needed on the way down! This was partly a good thing as I had developed a hell of a pain at the top of my left leg – something I’d not had for many years, but that’s because I don’t exercise enough. Going downhill stopped this particular pain, but allowed many others the chance to surface. Joy.

Still, I made it up and back again in a little under 5 1/2 hours, which I’m quite pleased with. The nice staff at the bottom gave me a little medal and – more importantly at that point in time – juice, energy bars and a banana.

A shuttle was taking people back to the hotel where we got to freshen up and fill up on “proper” food before the journey home.

A very hard slog, but all the best things are worth the effort.

If you feel the need to donate to the charity, by all means drop me a quick email or contact them directly via the web link above. I’m sure they’ll be happy to take your money!

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Ben Nevis – conquered

ACTION - Pulse Pounding Tales Volume 1

Published today is Action: Pulse Pounding Tales Volume 1. Why do I mention this? Because I have a story in it!

It’s an anthology of stories based on action heroes. Harking back to the characters and tales of the 1970′s when political correctness was second in line to plot, explosions were bigger, bullets only caused flesh wounds in the good guys and everything screamed along like the finalé to a Hollywood summer blockbuster.

Authors include Matt Hilton and Stephen Leather, plus a smorgasbord of other established talent and a bunch of newbies like me.

It’s a bargain at £2.56 (Kindle only, I’m afraid), and for the first month of release Matt is donating 50p per copy sold to the rather worthwhile Help For Heroes charity.

Clicky links for purchase are as follows:

Amazon UK and Amazon US

Spread the word!

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Action: Pulse Pounding Tales Volume 1

American Reunion

“The name’s Noah, motherfucker!”

Plot-in-a-nutshell: The class of ’99 have a 13 year reunion, featuring a return to the days of debauchery

See it if you like: the original films… but you’ve grown up a bit

I’d heard very positive things about this film from the handful of people I know who caught it on the opening night (or even earlier, at the world premier in Australia). As mentioned above, the three theatrical films in the series to date have been pretty good managing to maintain a good level of humour without digging the same hole over and over.

I’m glad to say that American Reunion manages to maintain this drive, and doesn’t fall into the trap of rehashing old joked the way the straight-to-DVD episodes did. What makes the difference above all else? The cast and original characters.

Our story begins 13 years after the original, which did indeed come out in 1999. There are plenty of references back to it, but our characters have moved on a lot. Some are married, some are successful, Jim and Michelle have a baby boy, Jim’s dad is a widower… quite a few changes.

Oh, except Stifler. He’s still acting like he’s 14.

As the film goes on, more and more of the original cast make appearances. It really is like being reintroduced to old friends yourself as the characters meet up and exchange memories.

The plot is superb. There’s no shortage of gross-out humour and the opening 2-3 minutes is as full of giggles as the original. Somehow writer Jon Hurwitz has managed to find a thread of originality and uses it to string a handful of shit-smeared, boobs-out, bondage-gear-wearing sequences into a story that ultimately has a real feelgood ending.

It’s always tempting to say that Eugene Levy is the star of the moment – his character is wonderful and the show of weakness that comes in as we discover he’s lost his wife really adds a new dimension. However, though he’s not upstaged by anyone else, the improvement in storyline and depth added to the other characters stops the film being just about him. He does, however, get the best line in the film – hence why I’ve used it above!

I don’t think fans of the originals will be disappointed. People’s senses of humour change as they age, and this fourth (and final?) film has taken this into account. All for the better.

While not being as rib-achingly hilarious as the first film was, it’s probably actually a better film overall as a result. Definitely worth seeing.

Related articles

• Cinema & Film: Film Review: American Pie: Reunion (coventrytelegraph.net)
• American Reunion/American Pie: Reunion is pretty sweet (mynotsofictionallife.wordpress.com)
• American Pie: Reunion – Film Preview (thomasjamesmitchell.com)

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American Reunion

Marvel’s Avengers Assemble

“I have a plan: attack!”

Plot-in-a-nutshell: Superheroes team up and fight bad guys. Well, dur.

See it if you like: Low-brow superhero flicks with too many characters.

There’s no denying the huge hype machine for this 142 minute effects-fest. With four films supplying the lead-in as far as story goes (more if you include the two Hulk movies) it has a lot to live up to. But does it manage it?

Well, as far as scale goes it’s pretty good. There’s a nice central bad guy and a nice huge threat towards the end to make it all larger than life. However, I found it somewhat messy with a couple of the characters virtually sidelined. Don’t expect the same level of cover for Black Widow and Hawkeye (Chris Evans) as for the other Avengers. In a way, it’s a good thing as they’re definitely weaker characters, certainly in this script. Scarlett Johanssen, for instance, just doesn’t convince me at all in her role, especially as the films plods on. She looks positively weak trying to wield two handguns.

On the flip side, there’s a great dynamic between Bruce Banner (Mark Ruffalo) and Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr.) and the banter between characters overall is pretty good. Snappy one-liners and a good dose of humour lift the film in just the right places. In fact there’s one very brief sequence – it involves Hulk and that’s as much as I’ll say – which had the audience roaring with laughter.

I wasn’t a fan of the Thor movie, but he’s much better in this. He’s just two dull to be the focus of a whole movie, but works well as part of the ensemble. I still don’t get how he’s a Norse god, but speaks with a posh English accent though.

The effects are predictably top-notch, with a good blend of live action and CGI. It looks like the effects masters are finally getting this right. The explosions are suitably meaty, and there’s plenty of destruction to keep even the most child-like of minds happy.

There’s not a huge amount in the way of plot – bad guy wants to take over earth, superheroes stop him (sorry if that spoils it for you) – and it does go very slowly in places. I confess to being a little tired on the evening we went, but I still didn’t expect to catch myself almost falling asleep. I did. Twice. One it got past this (around the hour mark), thankfully things picked up pace and I began to enjoy it more.

Overall, the two Iron Man films still stand out as the best recent offerings from this particular canon. The third in that series is coming up soon, and there’s also a teaser in the end credits of this film for more forthcoming action. Whether it’s a hint for Iron Man 3 or a second Avengers film, though, I don’t know.

Good, but not brilliant.

Related articles

• At The Fleapit: Avengers Assemble (2012) (heropress.net)
• Marvel to behold: Avengers Assemble falls short of being the best superhero film ever (mirror.co.uk)

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Marvel’s Avengers Assemble

Insomnium (Photo credit: Iain Purdie)

[For more pics of both bands, check out the Flickr sets: Insomnium / Paradise Lost]

You know sometimes you get to a gig, hear the support and think “I should have got here a little earlier”? Well, that happened tonight.

King Tut’s always have a late doors-opening time, around 8:30 when most venues are nearer 7:00. As such, I never know when to get there and by the time I should be leaving the house I’m actually starting to wind down for the night and thinking about getting a cuppa. Yes, I’m getting old. I’m dealing with it, so you have to as well.

I got to the venue around 10:00, picked up my Sacred Reich ticket from the bar (No booking fee! Fuck you, TicketMaster!) and walked upstairs with a pint of the eponymous lager. The place was packed as Finnish deathers Insomnium played melodically towards the end of their set. There were plenty of appreciative cheers from the crowd for the two songs I heard and rightly so. Definitely a band I’ll be checking out soon.

I’ve been following Paradise Lost for some time now – since my uni days in Bradford, in fact, around the time that Shades of God and Icon came out. The first time I saw them was at the Queen’s Hall, if I remember correctly, where I got in free as I was with the university radio station. The next time I saw them, or at least Aaron Aedy, was when I was glass-collecting at Rios and he wished me happy new year.

Paradise Lost (Photo credit: Iain Purdie)

That, for me, sums the guys up. You meet them once as a studenty fanboy, and they remember you enough to say “hello” several months later when they’re shitfaced at a new year party. Hell, I saw him a year later when I was working in PC World (dark days indeed) and I think I sold him a computer. The next time they played Bradford I was sat next to Aaron’s mum up in the gods at the St George’s Hall. The downside of guest lists is you often don’t know where they’ll put you!

Anyway, as the years went on (pretty much post-Draconian Times), I kind of lost track of Paradise Lost. I rediscovered them a few months ago and was pleased to see they were still doing well though mainly abroad. This was emphasised by the fact that they were playing a venue as small as King Tut’s on their tour. Great place, but it is tiny.

So on to the gig. With a little over an hour to fill, they managed quite a variety. Of course, I know the old stuff best but there’s nothing wrong with the newer material as I discovered. I think there were only two tracks off the newest release, Tragic Idol, which came out… erm… today! Along with those were a handful of others I didn’t really recognise, but quite a few I did.

“Widow”, “One Second”, “As I Die”… all great songs and as with many artists, these older numbers were the ones the fans cheered the loudest for. Nick introduced each track with his typical style of humour mixed with a dash of “miserable bastard”. Let’s just say that Jack Dee has some competition.

It is great to see a band play when the core has been together for so long. The only member currently with them not to have been there since 1988 is drummer Adrian Erlandsson. The other four are founder members and have never left the band, even temporarily as far as I can tell. To work and tour for so long with the same guys says a lot about them, and they’re very good live as a result.

Aaron is constantly banging his head a-la Scott Ian, Greg (still with long hair, the bastard) poses as he plays the high notes, Steve keeps the rhythm going on bass and Nick leads from the front. Having seen them at Download some years back, they’re as confident in front of a festival crowd as a couple of hundred drunk Glaswegians and it’s good to have had the chance to see them in front of such a small crowd.

Definitely worth taking my slippers off for, and I’ll be hunting for the new album in the morning.

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Paradise Lost / Insomnium – King Tut’s Wah Wah Hut, Glasgow

Lockout

“Here’s an apple. And a gun. Don’t talk to strangers – shoot them.”

Plot-in-a-nutshell: improperly (or was he?) convicted secret agent person must single-handedly save the President’s daughter from a prison. Which floats in space.

See if it you like: the idea of Die Hard meets Escape From New York meets Fortress

Based on an idea from Luc Besson, Lockout starts with a bang (actually, lots of them) and just doesn’t let up. It’s fast-paced, funny, utterly daft and thoroughly entertaining as a result. There are threads from many genres mixed up in the plot and the characters and dialogue are as over-the-top as you could hope for.

Guy Pearce plays our lead, be-muscled secret agent Snow caught for (allegedly) turning traitor and killing another agent, then disposing of the secrets he was supposedly stealing. As luck would have it, prisoners break out on board the floating space-prison to which he’s just been sentenced and he’s given a chance to earn his freedom in exchange for rescuing the President’s daughter (Maggie Grace) who conveniently happens to be up there.

This is a relatively low-budget film and comes out opposite the titanic Battleship (see what I did there?) against which it’s surely going to look like a tugboat. However, despite being a much “smaller” film in all respects, it holds its own in the entertainment stakes and most definitely deserves your time. The plot is more focussed than in the larger film with everything following our two main protagonists, and the sharp dialogue – mainly from Snow – is wonderfully dry. James Bond wishes he had this line in humour.

There’s nothing to complain about regarding the quality of the special effects either, although a couple of the speedier sequences are hard to follow as they pan and flip from angle to angle far too fast for these old eyes to follow.

Every action film needs a decent antagonist, and Lockout has two particularly nasty ones in the forms of mastermind Alex (Vincent Regan) and utter nutjob Hydell (Joseph Gilgun). They play off each other and offer two sides of the overblown lunatic that one central bad guy would have entailed.

While there aren’t any real surprises in the storyline, there’s nothing to stop the viewer going along for the ride and thoroughly enjoying the antics of anti-hero Snow. He’s a great character and I’d not mind seeing him in some kind of follow-up.

Incidentally, random link between this and Battleship? Grace played Neeson’s daughter in the awesome Taken (co-written by Besson), a sequel to which is due out later this year. Both actors are due to reprise their roles.

Related articles

• Cinema & Film: Film Review: Lockout (coventrytelegraph.net)
• MOVIES: Guy Pearce serves up punches and punchlines in ‘Lockout’ (kitsapsun.com)
• Review: One-liners, slapdash sci-fi in ‘Lockout’ (ctv.ca)
• Movie Review: Lockout Proves Just How Out of This World Space Prison Really Is (eonline.com)
• I Saw Lockout (znculturecast.wordpress.com)
• Review: Lockout Delivers Distinctly 1990s-style B-movie Action Goods (news.moviefone.com)
• SPINOFF REVIEW: “Lockout” (spinoff.comicbookresources.com)

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Lockout

The steep south face of Ben Nevis from Sgurr a' Mhàim (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

It’s not often I’ll ask for cash, but I’m doing a sponsored walk up Ben Nevis on May 6th and I need to raise £90 before then. If anyone would be kind enough to sponsor me a few quid, please let me know and we’ll work out how to get the dosh to me.

Obviously, if you’re local then I can just get the cash. Anyone else can probably get it to me via bank transfer or *spit* PayPal. If you’re a UK taxpayer, make sure I get your postcode and house number as well so we can claw more back off the government!

Oh, the cause – it’s St Andrew’s Hospice. Not one I’ve been associated with in the past, but one that the school I currently work at raises a fair bit of money for.

Thanks in advance, folks.

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Sponsor me!

Andrew W.K. (Photo credit: Iain Purdie)

[For full Flickr sets, see here: Andrew W.K ... and Hawk Eyes]

Another gig for three sneaking in with two tickets – although I think most promoters (except perhaps TicketBastard) would think it pushing things a little too far to try and charge a foetus for entry. Tonight’s headliner is a party master and he brought with him a new band from down south somewhere:

Hawk Eyes

I have memories of M*A*S*H when I see that name and I’d rather have been watching DVDs to be honest. They’re not bad and a couple of the songs got the foot tapping, but there was nothing memorable about them at all. Decent musicians, nice lads, some promise and a few cheers from the crowd… but overall just a filler before the main act.

Actually, according to the Wikipedia article (linked above), they supported Ginger Wildheart on his tour in December. I knew the name was familiar. Whether it’s the same band or not, I don’t know, but it could well be them. If it is, then they’ve definitely got better.

For the record, though, little SkullKrusher hid near mummy’s spine for their set. She wasn’t impressed.

Andrew W.K.

Andrew W.K. sells himself as a party animal. A man with an ethos that’s summed up by the statement ” Every day you’re alive – you don’t need any other reason to party.” His Twitter feed is full of party tips, reasons to party, people he’s partied with… He exists purely to make sure that everyone else has a good time. And to keep white t-shirt and jeans manufacturers in business.

Imagine, if you will, a party hooter horn thing in human form and made of 100% pure awesome. This is Andrew W.K. If you’re not bouncing by the time the first chords of the first song are struck, then there’s a mortician outside who wants to know how you got out of the nice cold room they were keeping you in.

You may notice that the Flickr set has fewer photos than I normally take at gigs. This is partly due to AWK’s white clothing making him very hard to photograph without glowing, but mainly as I just had to ditch my camera with Gillian, get into the middle of the crowd and go fucking mental.

Touring on his first (and best) album I Get Wet, the whole thing was going to get an airing, and it did. You know how the crowd sings along to the intro to Iron Maiden’s “Fear of the Dark“? They did that through the entire set. It’s not often you’ll see a crowd enjoying a set as much as this one, bouncing around and singing along – not as much of the crowd as tonight. Barring the handful on the balcony and a few round the sides (including certain pregnant ones), I swear everyone was was going crazy.

Andrew W.K. (Photo credit: Iain Purdie)

This included SkullKrusher who very quickly moved to the front of mummy’s belly and started thrashing like a mad one. Our kid has taste already!

AWK himself is quite the musician, covering keyboards, vocals, guitar and drums (the last two briefly) during the set. He was joined by a motley crew who were as much into the fun as he was. I don’t think you could pick six musicians who looked any more different. Yes – six. Quite a crowded stage!

Drums, bass and three guitars were ably covered. In addition there was a remarkably hot woman in a leotard on backing vocals. Unlike the pretty young thing helping out at the Ginger gig back in December, this woman didn’t look out of place for a second. Giving it her all, singing well and very much a part of the act rather than being purely eye candy.

I did get a nice picture of her bum, though. Sorry.

The set lasted a solid ninety minutes with minimal “crowd chanting for the band to come back on stage” time. A couple of slower numbers did get the crowd to calm down a bit, but not for long. Towards the end we were treated to a new song, simply called “Head Bang”. Oh, yes. We did. An epic new number, much in the style of the first album and definitely a highlight of the set.

I once heard AWK’s music described – by someone criticising it – as a series of 2 minute long beer commercials. They’re right. It is. Short, sweet, hits you hard and leaves you laughing and wanting more. “Head Bang” continues that tradition and long may that tradition continue.

Checking his Wikipedia article, I was staggered to read that he’s only 32. That means he was only 22 when I saw him destroy Leeds Festival back when he toured supporting the album the first time. Now, I’ll be honest – I’m not a fan of his other material. It simply doesn’t match up to I Get Wet with the odd exception. However, with a live show this good, who cares?

A great night’s entertainment and all three of us headed home smiling. Well, I know two of us did – I’m pretty certain the third would have if she knew how.

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Andrew W.K. / Hawk Eyes, Glasgow Garage