Have I mentioned Steel Panther yet?

I can’t remember if I’ve mentioned this bunch of nutters before but they have a new video out. Steel Panther apparently started off as a parody act purely ripping the piss out of glam bands. They did a show on Broadway or in Vegas or something. Google them to find out. It’s not important.

What is important is the fact that they’re incredibly entertaining, rude and don’t take themselves at all seriously. Very rock’n’roll!

They have also gone down the standard metal road taken by their forebears – Queen, AC/DC, Spinal Tap and Hayseed Dixie amongst others – and released a song about fat birds. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you “Fat Girl [Thar She Blows]” (courtesy of Metal Injection)…

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Who the hell is…?

Dimebag Darrell
Would kick Eminem’s ass any day

Well, after being out of the country for a couple of years and (happily) ignoring television, radio and the tabloids I find myself drowning in a sea of recently famous people. Now, whether they’ll be Beatles-famous or one-album-then-ditched famous, who knows.

One thing that’s getting me are the names they’re using. I know you have to make a name for yourself, and in some cases people take this literally. The stuff they’re coming up with these days is just pants, though.

I mean, who the hell is Lady Gaga? I don’t need to check out the radio stations to know I’d loathe her stuff. Assuming it’s a “she” and not a group?

Going through the charts we have Shakira – sounds like a dodgy bit of Manga; Dizzee Rascal – made that one up in the playground at school; Beyonce – I bet there are a million of those being born in council estates every day now; Mr Hudson – wasn’t that a character in Grange Hill?; Jeremih – inspired by Pearl Jam but unable to spell; Booty Luv – oh, come on

What happened to the good old days when people had really ace nicknames? All the best ones being from the world of metal, of course. Come on – you can’t beat any of these lot with your namby-pamby radio-friendly claptrap:

Care to argue? Well don’t bother – you’re wrong. Metal has the best nicknames and pseudonyms. End of. I’m not narrow-minded. I’m just right.

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And in music today…

The "devil's horns" symbol that Dio ...
Metaaalllll!!!!

A few things music-y popped up today so I thought I’d bang a post up rather than just raving about them on Twitter.

SLAYER!!!!!!!!!

As well as being overjoyed at getting a ticket to see them at Glasgow Barrowlands in November, I’m well impressed with the title track they’ve started streaming from the new album (World Painted Blood). It’s available from their MySpace page so you’ll have to put up with formatting that looks like it was dreamed up by a 6 year old with spatial awareness issues, but it’s worth it.

Much as I adored the ball-out utter thrashing heavyness of God Hates Us All, I was underwhelmed by Christ Illusion, it seeming like just more of the same. This new title track shows a lot more variety and a touch of the cleaner sound harking back to the likes of South of Heaven. If the rest of the album holds up then I’m very excited indeed.

Hatebreed

One album I’m no longer waiting for is Hatebreed’s Hatebreed, their fifth album. It’s superb, and the first real change in tone I’ve heard from them in their history. Not quite as in-your-face heavy as… well, everything else they’ve ever released. There’s even an instrumental on it.

This will be on repeat play in the car along with…

Megadeth

Got ahold of the new Mustaine & Co album Endgame last week and that’s been looped to death already. Definitely their best release in a long time, though I still think The System Has Failed was pretty good.

And finally… a 4 year old on the drums

Yeah, this is rather cool. I can’t include the video as they’ve disabled embedding, but head over to YouTube and check out this immensely talented kid. The prime video to check is the one of him drumming to Harvester of Sorrow (check out around 5:20 for some real skill), though he’s got loads more on his YouTube channel.

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SOAV

That’s System of a Violin. I made that up, but it works. Anyway, check this out for a pretty awesome cover of System of a Down‘s “Toxicity” by three fairly attractive women as performed on two electric violins and a drum kit.

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WMKmQmkJ9gg

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Thrash from the past: Pantera

Cover of "Vulgar Display of Power"
Vulgar Display of Power

I get seasick. I’m usually pretty good on transport, but anything floating on water still has a tendency to make my stomach tighten and my mouth water. It’s not guaranteed – I can be fine in the roughest storms then get weak-legged skimming across a lake.

Everyone has their methods to contend with travel sickness. Ginger is common, or fixing on a point on the horizon. I believe there are even pressure points on the thumb which apparently make a difference though not for me. I just look like a meditating green person then throw up in a paper bag.

My method is, I suppose, a version of that meditation. To drift off somewhere a little more comfortable where the bouncing isn’t an issue. Sometimes reading can do that for me, but as many people know this can also make you feel worse. The best method I’ve discovered is to pop in the earphones and listen to something you can really, really get into.

On the journey over from Gili Air back to Bali, I randomly selected Pantera‘s Vulgar Display of Power on the basis that I hadn’t listened to it in bloody ages. Good gravy. I’d forgotten how good it was. So good, in fact, that I just had to write a blog post about it.

I suppose it’s a good time to go on about Pantera, a band that’s no longer in existence and simply will not reform for various reasons. Metal is about as popular as its ever been and so many of the classic names are making comebacks. In amongst all this, new fans could be missing out on an awesome back catalogue of other acts and Pantera is most definitely one that your musical memory banks could do with having access to.

Originally releasing a couple of, let’s face it, crap glam albums that to this day will earn you a kick in the balls if you ask for them to be autographed, Pantera graduated suddenly into some hard-edged, grinding, thumping sub-thrash with a hint of hardcore. This came about with the release of the (in my opinion) slightly hit-and-miss Cowboys From Hell album. Undoubtedly the title track is an anthem and hearing the opening riff live, even by a covers band, sends the hairs up on the back of my neck.

However, the rest of the album is a mix of other really good heavy numbers and some wankery that harks back to the old days.

The follow up, 1992’s Vulgar Display Of Power, though… 53 minutes or so of sublime metal music. I remember this being one of those annoying albums back in the day as it wouldn’t fit on one side of a C90 cassette tape so I doubt I ever really listened to the last couple of tracks. In this day and age, though, it’s great value for money. not many bands give you nigh on an hour on a CD.

I can barely remember a club night back in the day which didn’t feature the superb “Walk” and “This Love”, probably the two “lightest” tracks on the album. A good night would also include “Mouth For War” and “******* Hostile” which still rates as one of the best thrash tracks of all time.

Fronted by scary boxing dude Phil Anselmo (now lead singer for Down), bass by Rex Brown, drums by Vinnie Paul and guitars by his brother “Dimebag” Darrell Abbott. It’s the latter who really made the band and who was taken from the music world far too early – shot dead in front of his family and fans while playing live in the US a few years ago.

The band had already split by then – general “blame” seems to have fallen at a rift between Anselmo and the rest of the band – and he was playing alongside Vinnie in their new project, Damage Plan. An awful incident which sent huge waves through the metal community (and ended up in the penning of at least one song – Machine Head’s “Aesthetics of Hate“, aimed at a journalist who for some reason chose Dime’s murder as an excuse to slag him off in the press).

Dimebag was a one-in-a-generation talent. An outstanding naturally gifted musician who was banned from local competitions as a child as he kept winning them all. Vulgar Display… showcases this talent perfectly with a huge variety in musical styles.

Blues is very much present, perhaps most notably at the start of “No Good”. “Regular People” is slow-paced and as heavy as anything Black Sabbath ever released. “******* Hostile” is unrelentingly-paced and in your face. “This Love” mixes slow balladic guitar and lyrics with a pounding chorus  that wouldn’t be out of place in a Hatebreed track. “By Demons Be Driven” is very arrhythmic and I’ve even heard riffs from it being “appropriated” by Dream Theatre in their live set.

Each track stands alone, and the album as a whole is undoubtedly Pantera’s best.

As I said, this band won’t get back together. I would reckon the chance of the three surviving members doing anything together being something around zero although the air does seem clearer between them than it has been.

So for this reason, especially if you’re fairly new to the metal scene (say less than 10 years), then this is one band from the past you really should check out. And Vulgar Display… is a prime place to start.

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