You know when you’re recovering from sunburn when you dry yourself after a shower and the towel’s covered in little pellets of squishy skin. Every time you rub, more of them come off and they stick to you as well so you’re never clean.
My head’s covered in them, like huge maggots, clinging for life until they dry and drop off. Oversized lumps of dandruff you can almost hear as they bounce off the carpet.
And I’m sneezing, spluttering and coughing. I think it actually is a cold, and not just that dust. Think yourselves lucky you don’t share a keyboard with me as mine’s covered in snot and phlegm. Well, my hanky’s soggier than Anni’s underwear at the sight of Billy Idol so there’s no point using that any more.
Guess what, though? I’m going to the gym tomorrow lunchtime. Oh yes I am. I’m either going to make myself better or get every other bugger ill trying.
Welcome to Jiang Zemijn’s Britain (he’s the dictator who runs China, in case you didn’t know)
I was going to complain about this, but I’m probably not allowed to.
It’s not just Star Trek fans
Someone who regularly reads this blog has sent me this link. It’s ******* grim, you have been warned. S/He said “im not sure how i just found this….” and frankly I don’t want to know. You know who you are, you sick individual.
Pass me a bucket.
Bloody hell, as wet as that? Actually, I wasn’t wearing any – I’d thrown them at the stage…..
And serves you right on the head – I had that factor 35, and offered to rub your head for you (oo-er missus) but you were having none of it in your butch, ‘I’m a hard Geordie-boy’ way. Now you get what you deserve!
Such poetry in your language. It’s almost enough to bring a tear to your eye.
No, sorry, that was dust.
What with the Bush administration USA-wards and the constant interference from Brussels right here, it’s been obvious for a while that the ‘democratic’ west is slowly transmogrifying into a bunch of dictatorships.
However, if you try to point this out in public the government(s) will be quite happy to prove you right.
Blimey, that’s a low flying helicopt
dcsun4… you didn’t used to go to Bradford Uni did you? Just “dcsun4” was the name of one of the computer terminals I used to use.
Sentient technology! Eek!
Department of Computing SUN server 4 died a long time ago. there is only the Centre for Alternative Research Lab…
Oh, it’s *you* ya ****… Why didn’t you say so! You know, I don’t know if I still have your mobile. Drop us an email 🙂
The skin thing. Get yerself with some P20 mate. Crackin’ stuff.
I remembered something today you forgot to mention – Phil Jupitus!
Oh, and why are you asking a computer terminal to email you? Don’t you have enough *real* friends?
I have no real friends, you’re all figments of my imagination. Who the ****** would hang around with a nutjob like me?
Even Phil Jupitus just walked off, swearing about his kid losing one of her shoes. He does a great impression of a shiny tomato, though.