And another few bob in overtime, which I’m going to need very shortly. For those not in the know, check back on Monday when (hopefully), I’ll remember to fill you in on the details.
Another patent
OK, well another idea that I could make millions from if I had the backing. And it was actually any good, but hey.
I was watching telly the other night and didn’t actually get off my arse and do something during the advert break for a change. Instead, I allowed the televisual sell-fest to watch over me. One advert in particular caught my attention for no real reason.
Some fit bird, apparently famous, clagging on about how great this new lipstick is because it never comes off or something. You put it on and it lasts all night. Some bollocks like that.
Now, I’m afraid that I know better. There isn’t a lipstick in existence that doesn’t get smeared down your nob when the lass wearing it is giving you a blow job (unless, of course, it’s a really crap blow job). I don’t care how glitzy it is, how wet-looking, how expensive or how tarty – it always leaves streaks after the first couple of gobbles.
What’s needed is a lipstick that can truly be advertised with the tagline "Sticks to your lips… not to his cock".
Anyone care to help me test drive some prototypes?
Anna who?
*checks link*
Woof. Oh yes. She can help.
Rochdale and blowjobs with expensive lipstick…
Why has my mind wandered to Anna Friel?
Let me get this right – you are offering to try on some prototype lipsticks, and then suck someones nob while wearing it?
I always knew you were weird!
Alfie – feck, I have no idea what’s going on up at St James’. It really all fell apart when they sacked Robson. Given that Sounness was about 4th/5th on the list of replacements and managing one of only three teams beneath us at the times stinks of desparation when we hired him. Hardly something to crow about.
Robson apparently lost control in the dressing room, with idiots like Dyer refusing to play where he was needed. I still maintain that of the two of them, we sacked the wrong one. When was the last time Bobby missed a match? We’d have got better value for money from him than Dyer, that’s for sure. And it’d have been a straight sign to the players that he’d take no **** and the board was behind him.
Sadly, neither were the case…
woman – that’s not weird, that’s gay. Which isn’t weird, it’s just not me. Let’s make this very simple for the obviously hard of thinking… Suck. My. Dick.
Eh up Mosh bud,
All the best to you, your family, all the boys from the Toon and especially to Michael Owen’s little pinkie metatarsel….. (I hope it’s OK for the World Cup)
I must say, the boy Freddie Shepherd looks a bit pissed off in the stands lately. Mind you, with dour git Souness in charge, what do you expect?
What the bloody hell was Shep’ thinking of when he ‘poached’ Souness? When I was a student, I used to watch Souey in a wine bar in Liverpool called ‘Streets’ ….
He used to have loads of cronies around him, drinking,drinking, drinking all bloody day. I thought he was a **** then, even though I was, and am a Liverpool fan and at the time he was the best midfielder in the country. When he became Liverpool manager, suddenly all the players in the squad got injured…. His weekly whinge was we would win IF ONLY we had a fit squad. If you remember, the same thing happened when he went to Blackburn….
I reckon it’s his training methods or something. There must be something wrong. With all the support you guys have, Newcastle SHOULD be winning stuff – and lots of it. But what is wrong?
I just thank God we have Rafa. What a guy….. bloody hell, I even saw Stevie Gerrard, the most talented, but miserable man in the footballing Universe actually SMILE the other day.
We should mould the entire England team around Stevie G. Sod Becks and Lampard. We can win the World Cup – but only if we play Gerrard in the position he wants to play in. OK rant over…
Anyway, all the best Mosh,
Alfie the red…..