This means you, Sharon. It’s about blood and stuff and I know as of today you’ll have had enough of that! *HUG*

OK. Stop reading. Now.

*sigh*. Fine. On your own head be it.

First of all, to explain to our American readers – we donate blood over here. Nobody buys it off us. The National Blood Service is a charity and we can donate every 16 weeks (pint at a time) or 4 times a year for platelet donation. The second involves sitting in a whizzy chair where they suck the blood out, shove it through a machine that pinches the platelets and then squirts it back into you again.

I just do the normal thing. I’ve missed a few over the years – I had to skip a year each time I went to Nigeria because of the malaria risk and so on. But today was my 25th donation, for which I get a nice certificate and a silver brooch in a nice box. Oh, and a cup of juice and some biscuits. They even have crisps and sometimes cake at this one as well.

All went fine. To start with. You get the questionnaire, they triple check your ID (I’ve yet to figure out why – I mean who’d pretend to be someone else just to give blood?), stick a pin in your finger to check the blood for iron content then start to suck it out of your arm with a big needle.

Now, it doesn’t hurt, it’s not uncomfortable and the staff are fantastic. Five minutes to fill the bag and a couple of test tubes and you lie back for 3 minutes putting pressure on the hole where the needle used to be. Then they pop a plaster on, sit you down and feed you the aforementioned nice beverages and biscuits.

This is where it went a bit wrong. Normal procedure dictates that you finish the drink, wave goodbye and go on your merry way. What you’re not meant to do is to continue bleeding from the little hole in your arm and gush it all over the table, floor, chair and your own clothing.

Silly me.

So, a 20 minute trip ended up taking over an hour because I kind of went all light-headed and had to lie down for ages afterwards before they’d let me leave. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to dig out the Vanish and pop my jeans in the wash before the blood chemically bonds to the fibres.

Well, at least I was expecting it. And I’ve had a good weekend, courtesy of Anni and Andy – ta, folks! I can just about remember our trip to Metro – cracking club and recommended for anyone heading to Cardiff who wants an “alternative” night out instead of the trendy clubs. Open till 3am, cheap drinks till midnight, and free toast at 1am!

The match was – surprisingly, given the result – rather enjoyable. Best atmosphere at a game for ages. Well, in our half of the stadium anyway. To quote one of our chants: “Your support, your support, your support is ******* ****”. The usual bunch of pathetic, crap, uncommited, glory-seeking tossers who only bother to make a noise when they score. Complete shower. Fans like that don’t deserve the success their team gives them.

It was also a great chance for Nicky Butt to play with his old team-mates again. A shame someone forgot to tell him he’s no longer on their ******* side, the stupid ****. Two of their goals were directly attributable to him just handing the ball off, he continually ignored Taylor on the left wing and he went straight down the tunnel at the end, unlike the rest of the team who had the decency to applaud the supporters.

So, another London derby for the final. I’ll personally be crossing my fingers for the Arsenal mob – their supporters were great on the Saturday. They actually deserve something this season.

Right – apparently I’m off for dinner now. Catch you when I get back home!

Who should I vote for?

Your expected outcome:

Liberal Democrat

Your actual outcome:

Labour -28
Conservative -15
	Liberal Democrat 36
	UK Independence Party 21
	Green 53

You should vote: Green

The Green Party, which is of course strong on environmental issues, takes a strong position on welfare issues, but was firmly against the war in Iraq. Other key concerns are cannabis, where the party takes a liberal line, and foxhunting, which unsurprisingly the Greens are firmly against.

Take the test at Who Should You Vote For

I’m getting all ready to head to Cardiff and also plodding through maths work, so this is the lot for today. Actually, I think I’m the first person I know of who’s had anything other than “LibDem” as the result on this test. Give it a go – only 23 questions.

OK, so this post is going to be footie-oriented, and then some ****’s getting it in the neck. So be it.

Cack-awful ******* ***** **** **** referees

OK, so we weren’t that great tonight. Carr lapsed. O’Brien seems to be career-suicidal. Bowyer collects yellow cards like whores collect venereal diseases. But we’ve effectively lost because of three shitty refereeing decisions.

The goal we got at St James’ should have been disallowed for Ameobi’s foul on a defender. But the other should have stood (the ref told Robert he could strike the ball then changed his mind), and Ameobi shouldn’t have been penalised for the ball-to-hand that left their goal wide open.

Sporting’s second goal tonight was a ******* mile offside. You could have squeezed three Boumsong’s in that ******* hole.

Still, at least they didn’t cheat anywhere near as much as most other foreign clubs, and there was no sign of trouble anywhere in or around the ground. I certainly can’t claim they cheated their way through. So…

Well done Sporting. A team that lives up to the English meaning of their name. Both refs however can **** off. As can your ******* linesmen.

From now on, though – come on Liverpool. Let’s see the one remaining English club in Europe do well (no, I don’t count Chelski).

Oh, and will someone please tell the tosspot commentating on Channel 5 tonight that Dyer pulling up with a hamstring problem isn’t a “worry for the weekend” because it’s the second game of a small domestic three match ban he might have heard about if he was a half-decent ******* journalist. It was only the biggest ******* football story for 6 months.

Prick. And the other one for not correcting him. Twice.

Impressed by an FA

Spain and England could learn a bit from the Italian FA. After the disgusting scenes at the Milan derbies, the Juve/Liverpool game and – frankly – for the last umpteen years, they’ve decided to step down.

Hard.

If any objects are thrown at the pitch during any Italian league game, the match is to be abandoned immediately. The team who’s fans are guilty lose the game 3-0. Simple as.

No piss-ant 20-minutes-wages fine for racially abusing players, no crap-awful fines to clubs with the king’s own bank account behind them for bringing an entire nation’s sport into disrepute. Fast, simple, harsh punishment.

This puts the onus on the clubs to train their stewards to actually do something about this mess. Search the home fans as well as visitors. Remove people from stands and arrest / fine / eject them for offenses, rather than just standing and bloody watching like at Juve the other night.

Ladies and gentlemen of the Italian FA – I applaud you.

***** on eBay

Two so far this week. I just popped a new mobile up for sale, and within a couple of hours had the following email:

hello,
how are you and your business,i am interested in buying you item for my daughter and I will be paying via postal order/paypal so kindly get back to me with the actual amount you are willing to sell the item as well as your name and address where the postal order will be address to and moreso kindly get the accurate postage cost via a registered royal mail service to my daughter in Nigeria and get back to me asap.
thanks.
thompson.

As soon as I saw the word “Nigeria” the phrase “**** off” sprang immediately to mind, especially as my ad says I only ship to the UK. There’s a scam going round involving dodgy cheques and dodgier Nigerians (sorry, but it is predomonantly people from there) which I’m fortunate enough to know about. I’m sure some other poor sod will get caught out.

I replied via eBay and hid my email address. Half an hour later I got a mail from eBay support warning me about this thieving ******. At least they’re on the lookout.

The other’s some little **** who bought some memory off me on “Buy It Now”. I got an email post-purchase asking if I accepted postal orders. Yup, fine – saves me the PayPal fees. Two days later I got another mail. Decipher this if you can:

hey soz lad i am new to ebay and wen i sent tht msg to u i thourgh the msg sent to my email account msg box not my hotmail account. so i av gone and temoved ur ltem frm my bidin list cos i thourght u wearnt gettin bck 2 me sorry!!!! if i c any more of ur items tht i wnt i will buy them from u first sorry mate!

Well **** you. It cost me to list the item. It costs me a percentage of the sale price when it’s sold. I wrote and told him (politely, of course – this will have to be taken up by eBay). His reply:

well am sorry bt another reason y i dntwnt ur item is tht ur post and
packaging it 2 much 2 pay sorry

Well **** you again. The post and packing (£2.50 for first class recorded delivery in static proof sponge and a sturdy cardboard box) is a lot less than some other people are charging. AND it was listed as part of the cost on the item before he bought it.

Then there’s the small matter of the warning that he’s entered into a legally binding contract after the totals have been provided and before he makes the final click to say “OK”.

eBay, though, say I have to wait 7 days (i.e. till the 19th) before I can lodge an official “Non Payment” complaint.

In the meantime, the idiot’s username on eBay is ryanx16x. If anyone wants his full name, address and email details… I won’t give them. For a while.

Grr.

A little message for Sharon:

******* WELL DONE!!! 🙂