Category: Uncategorised

I just caught an advert for Currys or Comet (or somewhere – they’re all the bloody same). First of all, it featured a woman who looked scarily like Linda Barker. I thought we’d seen the last of her after she single-handedly caused the ruination of Courts, but it seems not.

Secondly, they were advertising a "food centre". Now, I’m no technical expert, nor am I a white goods salesperson, so excuse my ignorance. But this food centre looked exactly like… a ******* fridge. A big fridge, I admit, but a fridge nontheless. Actually, it wasn’t even that big. I think mine’s about the same size but it lacks the all-important water and ice dispencer. Having said that, my fridge does actually have bottles of cold drinks and ice trays in it so I don’t really think that’s an issue.

All I can assume, therefore, is that this "food centre" actually is a fridge and they’re only trying to make it sound more exciting. Now this may work on kids ("NEW Frizdongles… with added… PTWANG!") but I hardly see it working on the age range of people who buy white goods. Tut.

In the meantime, I’m starting to veer towards getting a Mazda MX-6 or an MX-3. The MX-6 has two diesel engines, one of which is £500 dearer, has about 20% more horsepower, does 0-62mph 0.4 seconds faster than the other and has a top speed 3mph faster. But… I get a bigger number next to the badge.

It’ll be that one, then.

On the other hand, why should I be nice and seasonal. I’m going to whinge and be seasonal. OK, work. Actually, in fairness this isn’t their fault, but it’s annoying nontheless.

Historically despite never giving us an xmas party of any description (except one year), the company give us a bottle of alcohol of our own choice and a big turkey. Very nice, and always appreciated. I usually don’t bother with the turkey – there’s only me, after all – but last year I thought “why not” and took it. It was great. Piece of cake to cook, cut all the meat off and store it in the fridge and sandwiches / dinners sorted for a week.

This year, I’m all looking forward to it and sharing it with KitKat in some attempt to be able to say I wasn’t completely unseasonal. Only the tax man has decided otherwise. Someone spotted the company were dishing them out and decreed that a turkey is taxable income. I mean, come on. How the hell do you tax someone on a turkey?

Personally, I’d have happily received the turkey and cropped off 23% of it. I’d have stored it in a nice, safe, warm place until April when the tax returns were due, popped it in an envelope and sent it to the tax office. Seems fair.

Incidentally, I got a bottle of Cointreau this year for a bit of a change. Nice and orangey. Sainsbury’s (where the accountant decided to buy it from) seem to have weird ideas, though. There’s a sticker on the back with a label on it reading:

“WARNING – contains a secirity device. DO NOT MICROWAVE”

Who the **** microwaves bottles of booze?

Or is there an overwhelming urge when you’re sat holding a long-haired cat to stroke it and say in a foreign accent: “No, Mister Bond; I expect you to die!” and then chuckle a bit?

This is worth bearing in mind. If you don’t like something, just stage a violent protest and people will give up and let you have your way. Isn’t that handy? It’s like teaching our kids that screaming and kicking someone’s shins will let them have that lollipop they’re after.

The play in question was written by a Sikh woman. It was produced in association with the local Sikh community who were approached well before it began its run, and they were provided with copies of the script and a chance to feed back any concerns they had.

This they did with a level head and a fair mind. It was with their approval that the play was opened.

Yet you still end up with a bunch of fuckwits spoiling everything and – as has been pointed out – causing censorship through violence.

The playwright and cast are not the criminals, and should not be punished. The offenders were the non-peaceful protesters who should be locked up until they learn the civilised way to get your views across.

Or – and I loathe to say this as I know how it’ll come across – **** off back to their own country and do as they will. I am *more* than happy for Sikhs, Muslims, Jews, Hindus (etc etc etc etc) to live in this country. Hell, I *welcome* it as an opportunity for us all to learn more about our fellow mankind.

But they, as well as a noteable portion of the hunting lobby and everyone else with that pathetic primitive mindset, have to abide by the laws of the country in which they reside. If they don’t want to follow those laws, they can piss off somewhere else and fight each other into extinction… or voice their thoughts peacefully.

I was on site today and my laptop bag strap gave way again. It wasn’t as bad as last time where the bag swung in a perfect parabola and slammed the PC inside into a stone stair at roughly terminal velocity. Well, it was terminal for the laptop. The hard drive died completely.

This was a little less spectacular, thought he bag did bounce and roll all the way down about 15 steps. The damage amounts to a small piece of plastic that fell off and the keyboard now seems to be raised in the middle. Strangely, the first time I powered it up afterwards the sound worked for the first time in 2 weeks. I knew it just needed a good kick.

Anyway, even if I had bust it, I couldn’t care less. See, I only need some steam-powered piece of crap to last me to January 20th. Because that’s when I start my new job.

Yup. I quit. I handed in my notice. I’m leaving SoftSols / MatrixRM / whatever-they’re-called-this-week and moving to Software Solutions Partners. Much as I really like working there… OK. Much as I like the people I work with, it’s been a dead end for the last couple of years. Nowhere to move to (with 17 staff unless I bought the company I couldn’t exactly get a promotion) and no skill base to improve on as we only sell one product. Alright, there’s this new thing they’re marketing, but it’s designed to basically be boxed and on a shelf so I’d not come near it as far as support goes.

They are insistent I work out my notice. This is fair do’s as I have to pass a lot of customer-specific details on, particularly about one client. Said client knew I was leaving before my boss did. Oops. Mind you, the reasoning went something like this:

*bring bring*

“Hello. I’m the chap from the agency. We got one reference, but the other from your previous employer came back ‘no longer at this address’. Can you get us another one?”

I thought for all of two seconds. “Would a reference from a customer I’ve worked with for over three years do?”

“Sure – would they give you one?”

“Hang on…Ray? Would you write me a reference?”

He said yes, gave me a very nice reference indeed and I got the job. So I could hardly not tell him. Thing is, this very customer went mental when he found out that the sales guy he’d been dealing with for years left the company. It wasn’t so much that Mike left, it’s the fact that we deliberately withheld this information for ages until eventually someone told him. I just pre-empted this and made sure I was honest with a guy who I’ve grown to respect a hell of a lot over three years.

But anyway. I have a new job. Lalalalalala.

I have also test-driven the new C4 (nice) and have a Subaru Legacy sat in the driveway that I have on 24-hour test until tomorrow afternoon (annoyingly disappointing). I’m also toying with looking at the Focus (old one so I can get it cheap and loaded with toys) and a few others. Suggestions? I don’t know what my limit is car-wise, though no “sports” cars and no soft-tops. And I prefer a hatchback.