Finally, aside from driving off-road (as if), I’ve come up with a reason for driving a 4×4. To ram stupid fucking BMW Z4 drivers off the road, hopefully to the point of extinction. Yup, more road rage. I was going round the roundabout at the bottom of the M606. It has traffic lights on it. My lights turned green, so I started to move. A Z4 appeared at the road I was about to drive past. Appeared. As in, he hadn’t been sat there before. He slowed, looked, then floored it through an obvious red right in front of me. Sadly, as I drive a Golf and have good reactions I didn’t plough into the side of his tin-foil person-carrier and instead came to a stop a foot or so from the driver’s-side door.
I think the roads would be safer without wankers like him on them. Had I been driving a nice big Mitsubishi, Landy or similar and was a bit doddery I could have done us all a favour and wiped the twat out. I look forward to my twilight years and dodderiness. And cheaper insurance.
In other news, hunt supporters. What a bunch of complete fuckwits. Let’s leave aside the fact that making fox-hunting into a fun day out for all the family is somewhat barbaric and just concentrate on their ludicrous bahaviour today.
Now, I appreciate jobs will be lost if this government decision goes through. I appreciate that Tony Blair and co are going to force the law through in a way virtually unheard of in the past. I appreciate that the law and regulations it brings up are bloody ludicrous and are going to do sweet FA for animal welfare.
Still, let’s bear in mind that Jaguar are closing a plant shortly and jobs will be lost there too.
Do I see Jaguar workers forcing their way into the House of Commons and threatening MPs? Do I see them turning up for a protest in London armed with fireworks to throw at police who are only trying to do the job they’re underpaid for? Do I see them blocking the M25 in an unannounced protest that caused massive inconvenience for thousands of people who may even have been in support of their cause? Do I fuck. Because Jaguar workers are normal people, not inbred cousin-shagging countryfolk with more fingers than brain cells.
If you have a grievance, air it but do it in a way that doesn’t make you look like a terrorist, a thug or a selfish prick. How the fuck do you expect to get people to sympathise with your cause when you just come across as a total selfish idiot? Get a grip, get a life and get a new job.
Congratulations. All you’ve done is make people like me think that it’s a good thing you’re going to be unemployed. This should bring you closer to the breadline and therefore less likely to reproduce. Assuming your sister can even get home from London to bear your children, seeing as there’s a right jam on the M25.