More parking shenanigans

Well, he did it again. I got in from work yesterday evening to see his shitty white Fiat sat in the driveway. Kim and Sharon has both had to park down the street as neither will confront him and get him to move.

I, on the other hand…

After leaving my car parked behind his, I walked in declaring “if he knocks, I’m in the shower. I’ve just gone in and I’ll be a while. You can’t drive my car as you’re not insured.”

True to form, an hour later *knock knock knock knock bang bang BANG* on the door. I was upstairs. Sharon answered – disrupted from her footie match, no less.

“Ugh car ugh moooove ugh”

“Sorry, he’s in the shower”

“Ugh you ugh moooove *grunt*”

“I can’t. I’m not insured to drive it”

“Ugh ooh-ooh aah-AAH *fart*”

Door closes and (my nice neighbour who was watching from his window reports) all mental hell breaks loose. Pauses. Bottom lip going out. Face like thunder. Car door slams. House door slams. Back out into the car. Beginnings of a 3-point turn…

“He’s going to drive over the lawn!”

“He ******* is NOT.”

Either he realised someone was watching or, for once in his life, common sense prevailed. Car stops, out he gets – leaving the keys in the ignition and the engine running – and storms back into his house.

I gave him 15 minutes, during which he straightened his car up again. Probably glad that the lass at number 7 who tore strips off him before wasn’t around, or she may have seen that his tyres were on her front lawn.

Popped out, moved my car to the other side of the street and had a quick word with a chap over there… who said “just park behind him, he’s a selfish little **** that one.” Surprising, as he lives nowhere near him and hasn’t actually had any issues. He just knows from all the other people who’ve had issues.

Anyway, rat boy emerged a good 2-3 minutes after I’d gone back in the house. He won’t risk confronting me, the little yellow bastard.

Called the council today, as well. They’re adamant that it’s not a planning issue, despite the parking regs being listed on a planning document. They’d actually closed the issue but hadn’t bothered to tell me or the other neighbour who complained.

However, they’ve asked for copies of the documents, and have also passed the issue on to the Antisocial Behaviour department who will take it further. Mentions of intimidation, hygiene issues, persistent noise, littering and basically being a **** kind of made them decide he needs looked at.

As ever, the story unfolds exclusively on here. More as I get it.

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He didn’t hang round near the door when I answered either but was getting back in his car… looks about 12!


I know 12 year-olds who are far more considerate and “adult” than he is.

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