The Sitter / Haywire

Yay for mothers-in-law. A babysat evening allowed us to cram two films in at the local Cineworld. Unfortunately, one of them wasn’t The Darkest HourÂ which Cineworld Parkhead had decided to shove on for a single 2D performance a day. At lunchtime. And they can get bent if they think I’ll waste money on a 3D performance.

The Sitter

“I’m more of a ‘sit on the couch, do what I say or I’ll kill you’ type of babysitter.”

Plot-in-a-nutshell: College dropout is forced into babysitting three troublesome kids. A night of chaos/hilarity/adventure ensues.

See it if you like: Probably stuff like Adventures in BabysittingÂ or Role Models.

Jonah Hill is somewhat like Seth Rogan in that he always plays the same character. He’s toned down a little for this one, probably as it’s got a young cast. Mind you, any movie with a young girl saying “****** up” is going to score giggle points.

It’s not a new plot – there were at least two films with a similar story released in the 1980’s – but it’s still a good little story. Hill plays Noah Griffith, a college dropout whose father walked out on him when he was a youngster and who now lives with his mother. Our story opens (after some oral sex shennanigans) as Noah is convinced to baby sit so that his mother can go out and hook up with someone who might make her happy.

Of course, the kids he’s to look after turn out to be a bit of a handful. And, of course again, he has to end up in some dodgy situation that places them all in danger. Like, I don’t know, being hunted by a drug dealer and his boby-building henchmen. The usual.

Throw in a wobbly bit of romance, a ton of swearing and a little bit of “finding himself” and you have a shade over 80 minutes of fairly entertaining schmaltz.

Gillian thought it was a little slow, but I was fine with it.Â Not great, not bad but far better than I expected it to be.

Haywire

“You want me to be eye candy?”

Plot-in-a-nutshell – female secret agent finds herself being used as part of a dodgy bit of work, so goes rogue to try and find the culprit. I think.

See it if you like – weak thrillers with top-notch fight scenes

Steven Soderbergh is known for making high-end “classy” films, and he turns himself to the spy thriller genre for this 2-hour plodge. It’s well-filmed with some excellent fight scenes, but overall the plot doesn’t match up to the cinematography.

The cast is superb and it is well-acted. Gina Carano is both hot and tough as Mallory, the CIA contractor who finds that things weren’t quite what they seemed in her last mission. The story starts with her recalling events to … I’m not sure. Some random she seems to have met in a coffee shop. I don’t think we actually find out who he is. This takes up the first 45 minutes or so of the film and then we step into the present day.

Now I’m not sure if the plot is as complex as the more upmarket reviews make out. Certainly, I didn’t go “wow” at the supposed twist at the end. Partly as I didn’t quite get it (I was tired – Friday night after a long week) and partly as I’d stopped caring. The story just didn’t grab me the way a more action-oriented film would have and I just had a feeling that I’d seen it all before.

Admittedly it is well filmed. It looks lovely and makes good use of non-famous areas of cities such as Barcelona. Alleyways and regular streets rather than landmarks. The fight scenes are superb, not just in their vicious nature but by the toning down of the sounds. Gone are the usual Hollywood smacks and bass thuds with each punch. Instead each fist lands with a dull thwack which sounds a lot more realistic.

I think we both agreed with the person behind us when the trailers started to roll. He turned to the person next to him and stated, “Well, that was crap.” Typically Soderbergh in that the film magazines trip over themselves to rate it highly when the general cinema-going public would, I feel, be more entertained watching something like RED.