Category: Entertainment

Thursday film round up – from last Thursday

Review: Enter 'The Hurt Locker' And Prepare Fo...
The Hurt Locker

Oops. I never did get round to posting this on time. Right, at present I get Thursdays as a “personal study day”. As I study over the weekend instead, I give myself this as a day off and make full use of my cinema card. Last week I managed to cram three films in around a quick lunch and a leisurely hour in McD’s using the free wifi.

The Hurt Locker

First up is Kathryn Bigelow‘s newest effort. I’m amazed this isn’t on in the “smaller” Cineworld cinemas such as Dundee on the basis that it has a big budget, a name director and a recognised cast. What else do you need to not be classed as a “minority interest” film? What really annoys me is that it’s bloody brilliant and fewer people are getting a chance to see it as a result.

Plot-in-a-nutshell: Men in Iraq defuse booby-trap bombs. Usually. Only you don’t know when they’ll fail, regardless of the grade of actor playing them.

Bigelow has managed to shoehorn more tension into this film than in any three modern schlock horror films. There’s enough tension to make a steel cable snap.

Not just the bomb defusing scenes are taught. There’s a superb quarter hour where our main characters (plus a couple of incidentals) are pinned down by sniper fire.

Then there’s the fact that some of the events aren’t preceded by “will-he-won’t-he” moments. They just *BAM* happen.

I can’t point you at them right now, but I read quite a few comments on reviews before I saw this. A handful were from people who’d served in Iraq and Afghanistan and they heaped praise on the realism of the film.

Highly recommended if you have the nerve to sit through it.

District 9

Being “presented by” someone – even Peter Jackson – is often a death knell for a film. Or am I just thinking of how awful the Tarantino-presented Killing Zoe was? Maybe. However, Neill Blomkamp has done a decent job on this sci-fi effort although it’s still not perfect.

Plot-in-a-nutshell: Aliens arrive, seemingly by mistake, and hover over Johannesburg. They end up corralled into a slum (the titular District 9) and treated like second-class beings until something goes wrong as they’re being moved away from the city.

The cast is – as far as I can tell – pretty much made up of utter unknowns. There isn’t a bad one in the bunch, though. Obviously, focus is on the central character of Wikus Van Der Merwe (Sharlto Copley), who is very good but did bring back memories of Derek from Bad Taste.

It begins  as some kind of docu-drama but rapidly becomes a mixture of this format and regular filming which does jar somewhat. Either make it all look like it’s from news camera footage or don’t bother. To offset this, the effects are simply superb. There’s a great blending of CGI and traditional “man in a rubber suit” work for the “Prawns” which works very well.

There’s no denying the “wouldn’t be more obvious if it kicked you in the crotch” allegory of people of a different appearance being kept in shanty towns in South Africa. It’s a point that sadly still needs to be made and when you consider that the film was made in that country it’s perhaps a little brave for them to basically be pointing out their own flaws.

This aside, it’s a very entertaining sci-fi flick. It wasn’t as good as I was hoping – the plot gets rather linear after the halfway point – but you do start to care more about the Prawns once this mark is reached and you learn more about them.

Worth a watch, but don’t believe the hype. I only hope they don’t go the obvious path and release District 10 but I fear it’s inevitable.

(500) Days of Summer

Yes, a rom-com. No, I’ve not gone soft. Well. No more than usual. I had a natural aversion to the film as it features Zooey Deschanel. While I’m aware that she is bloody attractive, she was also in the atrocious Hitchiker’s Guide To the Galaxy movie and thus will be tainted evermore.

Plot-in-a-nutshell: Boy meets girl, boy loses girl. Erm. Sort of. Only it jumps back and forth like a cross between Memento, Pulp Fiction and When Harry Met Sally.

This jumping about could have been such a headache, but it’s handled superbly well with careful use of graphic set pieces and a modicum of narration.

The story itself isn’t a hugely original one. It is, however, told in a novel way and with a great line of humour running through it. I don’t want to give too much away, but the ending isn’t what you’d expect. My only problem with it was that it mirrored a very recent relationship of mine far too closely for my liking. Don’t worry, I’m not going to sue them for ripping off my life. I do believe in coincidence.

Much as I did enjoy this, more because I wasn’t expecting to, I’d still rate Bandslam as a better rom-com. And it has better music. But still – this is very entertaining and a good date movie if your other half has a sense of humour.

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SOAV

That’s System of a Violin. I made that up, but it works. Anyway, check this out for a pretty awesome cover of System of a Down‘s “Toxicity” by three fairly attractive women as performed on two electric violins and a drum kit.

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WMKmQmkJ9gg

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Filmfest!

The Arricam ST, a popular 35 mm film camera cu...
From here to screen

I managed to catch six films in three days this week. I had my reasons. Partly being away for a while meant that I missed a good few releases. Also, I’ve been paying £13.50 a month for a “all you can watch” card which isn’t valid in Vietnam so I had to play catch-up. OK, in the order I saw them:

G-Force (3D)

Nothing to do with Battle of the Planets (I believe that’s being given a separate movie makeover), this is a story about guinea pigs. And a mole. A fly, some cockroaches, a hamster/ferret and three mice also feature. Oh, and a few humans.

Yes, it’s a kid’s film, but a good one with more than decent CGI on the starring rodents. The vocal talent isn’t to be sniffed at, either, though Steve Buscemi completely steals the show with one of the secondary characters.

The plot is simple enough for the youngsters to follow with a wealth of film references for the adults to spot and smirk at. It’s simple, fun and enjoyable – and the 3D is very well done making it worth the extra that’s charged for it.

The Final Destination (3D)

First off, I like the title. The fact that it was obviously going to be the last in the series was one of the draws for me, along with the fact that it was in 3D. I think the first one was the only one I saw at the cinema, the second and third were DVDs. It’s worth seeing at the cinema for the 3D, definitely.

If you’ve seen the earlier films, you know what to expect. A horrible accident (this time at a speedway track) after which someone “wakes up”, freaks out and leaves before it actually happens. The film then follows the now-survivors as death stalks them and kills them in imaginative ways. This is no different to the earlier films. At all. It doesn’t even try. But why mess with what’s worked so well up till now?

The opening credits are fantastic – I loved the “x-ray” view of random accidental killings. Great to see some work going into the credits as they’re so often just a dull segment while you wait for the film to kick in.

Of course, the reason everyone watches these films is for the deaths. There are plenty, it’s fairly gory and a good half of them will make you laugh (or groan) due to the tasteless nature or the bad jokes surrounding them. Also, keep an eye out for some subtle in-jokes in the background. There’s a bus floating around with “108” painted on it – the flight number from the first film. I’m sure that’s not a coincidence.

Randomly, the best bit of 3D is a sticking plaster floating in the swimming pool about halfway through.

If you enjoyed the others in the series, this is a fitting end.

Aliens in the Attic

Yeah, another kids’ film and another that’s not too bad. Decent effects, some good dialogue and a handful of child actors you don’t want to throttle.

Plot-in-a-nutshell: a family goes on holiday to a remote house and the kids discover that a diminutive alien race have decided to use it as a starting point to conquer the earth. It’s up to them to save the planet.

The reason for adults not getting involved is simple and clever and puts the kids at the forefront of the film. There’s a ton of great slapstick including a wonderful kung-fu sequence with a granny. All very silly, but very amusing.

Bandslam

Amazingly, I think the best film I saw this week. Imagine School of Rock without Jack Black (not necessarily a bad thing). This is a very well written film with some incredibly good performances from the young cast. The “battle of the bands” central theme is simply a pole to hang a selection of coming-of-age stories from and, to a large extent, is forgotten about until the film’s climax.

Plot-in-a-nutshell: A young guy and his mother move to a new town where he struggles to make friends at school. He falls in with an ex-cheerleader and a goth, starts to manage a band and they enter a huge local competition opposite the utter favourites. Don’t expect an obvious ending…

I seriously can’t recommend this film highly enough. Kids will love the simpler side of the plot with the character conflict, a bit of slapstick not much) and the utterly kick-ass soundtrack. Adults will appreciate how well-filmed it is, the depth of the characters, the fact that Lisa Kudrow is genuinely excellent as the single mother… and the utterly kick-ass soundtrack.

This film hasn’t done well at the box office and one reason may be that it’s just not been hyped enough. Had it been “Disney’s Bandslam” then it would likely have been a launching pad for a fortune in merchandising with an advertising campaign to match. It would also have been bland, boring, banal and not worth your money. More likely High School Musical: Bandslam instead of a deep, incisive, clever, witty, hugely entertaining piece of cinema.

Oh, and a delightful cameo right at the end.

See it. Please, just go and see it. Give it the recognition it deserves.

The Time Traveller’s Wife

OK, I know this screams “chick flick” with a hint of sci-fi just to trick the guys into seeing it, but it’s a really good film.

Plot-in-a-nutshell: a man with a genetic disorder hops around in time against his will. He meets a young girl in his travels and – eventually – meets her in “real life” and they marry. You could guess that from the title…

Time travel films are always going to be a bit weird and open to paradoxical issues. However, the scripting (and I assume original novel) on this one are very tight indeed. The science part of the story is minimal – he travels. He doesn’t know why and nobody can ever explain it. It just happens, it’s a mystery. Perfect. No technobabble.

What’s important is the character development. On the whole, the film follows the central character but sometimes leaves us with those he befriends as he vanishes for undetermined periods. We get to see the effect his “leaping” has on himself and those around him.

This is a lovely film. A great story, beautifully told and very well acted by all involved. Although a little lengthy, it never drags. Yes, it’s really a chick flick but I still enjoyed it a hell of a lot. Pack tissues though – you’ll need them. Girls, that is!

Funny People

The last film of the blitz and I think the longest. It certainly seemed it. Thing is, it’s not very funny and I don’t recognise most of the people in it – even though a lot appear as themselves. I guess it helps if you know a lot of American stand-ups and sitcom actors.

Plot-in-a-nutshell: a famous comedian discovers he’s got some form of leukaemia and takes on another fledgling comedian to keep him company, write his jokes and the like while he undergoes therapy.

The stand-up sections are painful. They’re simply just not funny. Even the ones fronted by Adam Sandler playing his “famous” character are just lame. I’d be cringing and asking for my money back if I’d paid to get in to those clubs.

None of the characters are really likeable. The acting’s stilted and drags the film down in places. The two child actors are painful to watch. It’s too long. The story goes nowhere and just… ends.

Sandler can act, there’s no doubt about it. This flm proves it, but one way it does that is to show him doing his “silly” act as part of the central character. And it’s awful. You have Sandler, the talented actor, playing Sandler the annoying git with the stupid voices around which his earlier career was founded.

I’d heard great things about this film, but they’re wrong. Just don’t bother. Go and see Bandslam a second time instead.

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Cheap recipe: egg on toast

two slices of toasted white bread
One essential ingredient

I was just rattling this off to @driahades on Twitter and thought I might as well pop it on here to show exactly how lazy a “cook” I am. It’s cheap and very customisable depending on taste and ingredient availability.

You will need:

  • 3 large eggs
  • two slices of bread and a means of toasting them
  • microwave
  • small microwaveable square bowl, preferably just smaller than a slice of toast
  • salt
  • pepper, ketchup, HP sauce, sliced ham, cheese… anything else you’d like to mix with the egg

Prepare the extra ingredients first – chop up ham into small pieces, grate cheese finely, hack away at a green pepper until it’s in tiny chunks… whatever you plan to add, get it done now.

Crack the eggs into a mixing jug. Sprinkle some salt in and then whisk like hell. You want to get a lot of air mixed in there.

Pop the toast on. Ideally you want to have the toast popping up just before the eggs finish in the next step. Adjust timing to your toasty preferences and the equipment you have.

Add the extra ingredients to the egg and whisk like mad again. Pour the resultant goo into the microwaveable bowl. Shove it in the microwave on “high” for about 3 mins. As it cooks it’ll rise up like some kind of yellowy sponge monster. It’s done when there’s little or no liquid egg left at the bottom, but don’t overcook.

Hopefully your toast will eject before the egg’s done. Spread some sauce (your choice) on each slice to taste. I go for HP.

When the egg’s done, whip it out and run a knife under it to separate it from the dish. Drop it onto one slice of toast, put the other on the top (sauce sides “inside” – duh) and squish. Hold it for a few seconds and the egg will grip the toast and hold the sandwich together as it cools.

Eat and enjoy. Note how, if it’s done right, the scrambled egg doesn’t fall out of the toast the way it would do it you made the sandwich up off a plate. Neater and tidier! And less washing.

As ever, please feel free to comment with any ideas you have for extra ingredients of anything.

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Inglourious Basterds

Inglourious Basterds
Inglourious Basterds

A new Tarantino film comes along about once every 8 years. That’s a proper “directed by” film rather than a “presented by” or “produced by” where his name’s just used to bring in cash. The problem is, since Pulp Fiction there hasn’t been a single one worth the wait.

Inglourious Basterds continues this theme of disappointment. I thought Kill Bill sucked so much that I didn’t bother seeing part 2 until a friend insisted I watch it on DVD. It was no better. Where Reservoir Dogs and Pulp Fiction used the similar trick of bouncing the story back and forth until the whole became apparent, the following films have been more linear. Instead of clever storytelling, Tarantino’s instead gone for arty cinematography and it just looks pretentious.

As for the trick in IB of using big porn-star lettering everywhere to point out characters… didn’t Guy Ritchie do a better job of that in Lock, Stock… and the like? Slow-motion killings and music that just doesn’t fit or suit the scene add to the mess. For a modern film, it looks positively dated.

The story is linear and quite predictable. There’s no real twist other than you don’t expect things to work out at the end (as ever, trying not to spoiler anything).

Plot-in-a-nutshell: a Jewish American special forces team working in France gets wind of a chance to eradicate Hitler and his cabinet in one fell swoop during a film premier in Paris.

In fairness, there are some excellent performances from the cast. Having the film in German and French, for the most part, lends some kind of authenticity which many action films don’t have. It’s certainly better than the usual “bad accents” school of thought. Sean Connery‘s “Russian” captain in The Hunt For Red October, anyone?

Generally, though, I think I’m the first person I know who’s not really enjoyed it – certainly judging by the Twitter posts I’ve seen over the last week or so. I’m far more excited about the upcoming District 9.

Is it crap? No, not really. I’d definitely go for “overblown and over-hyped and just overall rather disappointing”.

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