Time Gentlemen, Please! is the sequel to Ben There, Dan That which I railed about some time ago. Both are made by Zombie Cow Studios which seems to be a one-man act as far as I can ascertain.
I loved BTDT – it was one of the best graphic adventures I’d played in some time. If you like your humour quirkly and slightly disgusting then this is definitely for you. Playing right through will take you a couple of hours, even if you know the solution so the asking price of £2.99 is well worth it. After all, a cinema ticket costs twice that.
Pop over to the web site and nab yourself a copy. It’s Windows-only, which is a shame, but I’m sure it’ll keep me busy on the flight to Bangkok next week!
That may be the name of a song, actually. In this case it’s referring to my ongoing addiction to all things “new gen” Doctor Who. Having finished all four seasons and the specials, I moved onto Torchwood. Anyone else watch the whole series in two days (while also watching Transformers 2)?
The sci-fi’s good, the effects are better than Doctor Who and there are women kissing in it. Mind, I still get uncomfortable watching two blokes paying tonsil hockey.
So what took me so long getting onto the Dr Who bandwagon? Simple – the first two episodes of the relaunch were bloody awful. The story was crap, the acting (Doctor aside) was dreadful, the effects were a joke, and Billie Piper had only just begun to show how mind-bogglingly annoying she was. It really was complete cardboard.
I forced my way through those episodes again and then onto the later stuff. Amazingly, it just got better and better, much as Buffy did between the first half-season and into the second. Story arcs and in-jokes get set up. References appear between spin-off series. Actual character relationships develop, and oh! that “Face of Boh” revelation at the end of season 3!
With luck I can finish season two of Torchwood in the next couple of days around booking flights and packing. Unfortunately, I gather season three – a 5-part, one-week special – will be broadcast while I’m Thailand. Arse. Seeing as I can’t access iPlayer over there (and it works like crap on Linux anyway), and will have expired by the time I get back I’m rather glad we have torrents.
On a scale of “meh” to “wow”, Revenge of the Fallen makes the mercury explode from the top of the thermometer in glorious CG red splashes.
Plot-in-a-nutshell: there’s a plot? Oh, yeah. Some metal thing puts some mumbo-jumbo into the kid from the first film’s head and the bad guys want it. Which means lots of robots beating the crap out of each other.
I was listening to Radio 5 Live on the way back and someone connected with the upcoming feature Moon spent a good few minutes absolutely slating Transformers 2. The basis for his argument was that science fiction is – or at least used to be – about things other than big robots hitting each other. He’s right, you know. The likes of Soylent Green, The Omega Man and 2001 were definitely more high brow than this… but Transformers has big sodding robots from another planet! If that’s not science fiction, I don’t know what is.
Sure, there’s only a basic story – enough to hang a few gazillion computer calculations off – but there are also a fair few laughs and some quite outstanding action sequences. Oh, and there’s Megan Fox for the eye candy. At least I’m assuming she’s stunning – it’s hard to tell when it’s so patently obvious she’s wearing enough makeup for Optimus Prime to cover up his wrinkles.
If I had to pick a stand-out performance, I’d go for John Turturro as the voice of Jetfire. Whoever decided to make him an aging Brit was a genius. Watching a hulking rustbucket on two legs stagger around and say “bollocks” helps take the Transformers out of “object” territory and into “character”.
If I have a complaint about the film it’s that there’s just too much going on at times. The screen is only so big and the effects so complex that I just felt like I couldn’t take it all in. A shame that there isn’t a local IMAX screen as this is most definitely a movie that would benefit from the additional screen real estate. I believe the IMAX version is also a noticable amount longer.
Science fiction comes in many flavours. As do summer blockbusters. Revenge of the Fallen fits well into both categories and they don’t bust blocks much bigger than this.
Yup, another kids’ film. And a pretty darn good one as well. Bedtime Stories is one of Adam Sandler‘s less annoying movies where he just plays a person rather than a character. Ben Stiller should realise his films are better under the same circumstances as well.
Plot-in-a-nutshell: Sandler plays Skeeter Bronson, a luckless chap who’s father passed the family motel on to a business man with a promise that Skeeter would one day run it. Of course, this doesn’t happen and Skeeter becomes the handyman. He entertains his niece and nephew with the titular bedtime stories which start to – in some haphazard fashion – come true.
It’s a fairly familiar plot, on the whole, especially for Sandler. However, it’s good fun with plenty of little background gags that may even make it worth an extra view. As Skeeter tells his sister’s kids the stories, the scene shifts into whatever fantasy world the tale is set in leading to some good jokes and special effects. They’re the kind of thing you wish you could dream up at a moment’s notice if you’re trying to get a small child to settle down for the night.
The bad guys are suitably bad (and I was amazed to find out that the crotchety one was Lucy Lawless), the good guys suitably sickly and the animals suitably cute. I was impressed with how the scenes from the stories worked their way into real life – especially the last one. Surprisingly clever, in fact.
One thing that did grate, though, was Courtney Cox‘s performance. It looks like she’s had some kind of facial operation which is weird enough, but all of her lines are out of sync with her mouth. I can only think that the weird look affected her ability to talk at the time of filming and they did a pants-awful job of the dubbing afterwards.
My little cousin loves this film and I can see why. Great family fun.
OK, not only did I watch Agent Cody Banks one night, I followed it with Destination London the night after. Overall I was pleasantly surprised, and the films are very different from one another.
Plot-in-a-nutshell: Cody Banks is a 14 year-old drafted into the CIA via a spy summer camp (of course). Bad guys want to take over the world with a mad plot. He stops them (in both films).
We’re introduced to Cody (Frankie Muniz from TV’s Malcolm in the Middle) in the first film with a scene at home followed by an short action sequence. These cover the obvious bases so we know who he is – an average teenager with above-average abilities.
The film’s madman with views of global domination is Brinkman (Ian McShane) who is forcing one Dr Connors to create a horde of nanobots capable of eating metal. Brinkman even has an evil henchman (Arnold Vosloo from The Mummy).
Banks is taken under the wing of a rather hot “handler” and between them they wheedle Cody into the interests of Connors’ daughter to infiltrate the mountain lair of Brinkman. All very James Bond Jr., really. Oh, and there are gadgets. And a mad inventor who creates them.
The film has action, slapstick and laughs. The effects are pretty decent for what is a comparitively low-budget offering and it offers bags of entertainment. As ever in a good kids’ film, adults are made to look bad compared to the children.
Points for spotting the “Flynn” reference late on in the movie.
Agent Cody Banks 2: Destination London
Destination London is a little different. It’s more of a children’s film than the first offering. The action is more slapstick, the plot a little simpler and the humour more kiddie. There’s even a random fart gag and a character called “Jerkalot”. This time we have another madman intent on taking over the brains of many heads of state. Along with more gadgets and the most bonkers “Q” rip-off character, it’s a worthy sequel though not as good as the original from this adult’s viewpoint.
Neither movie is as good as Stormbreaker, but that’s partly due to Alex Rider being English. And like Bond, to be a good secret agent you really have to be English.
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