Smokers taxed again (with any luck)

A happy little story at the BBC, as the government proposes plans to force smokers to buy a £10 permit each year to be able to buy tobacco.

Their argument? Another hurdle and another expense may make more people give up.

The spokesman for FOREST’s **** argument in response? Taxation is already too high and the groups worst hit will be the elderly and those on low incomes.

Well, if they give up then they’ll save a lot of money that they’re currently wasting on ******* fags, won’t they you stupid little ****?

You at the back! DIE!

Great story on the BBC News today about proposed plans to retrain ex-military personnel as teachers. I can see the scenes now…

"Smith! What do you mean the dog ate your homework? Outside and give me 20 laps of the field in the pissing rain! Johnson! Stop picking your nose! Drop and give me twenty! Viduka, you fat ****! Lose some weight or I’ll kick it off you! Eastwick! I saw you punch Chalmers, you little bastard! Call that a punch? *SMACK* That’s a punch, you pathetic little ****! Stop crying and get a mop! Don’t bleed on my ******* floor!

Right, homework’s due in at oh-nine-hundred tomorrow. Anyone who doesn’t hand it in will be left on the Downs and expected to walk home by Tuesday. CLASS DISMISSED!"

Another advantage is that the new staff will be used to working with shitty old equipment after the crap we force them to serve with as soldiers. Metric rules? Pah. Just give them a wooden stick with a straight edge. It does the job. Who needs a blackboard when you can just carve notes into the plasterboard walls with a blunt hunting knife?

Thing is, does anyone reckon our troops would last a week against a classroom full of hoodies from inner-city Brum?

Oooooh, just **** OFF you little ****!

Sorry for the outburst, but Bush is opening his stupid ******* mouth again and once more has raised my ire. Some brief bits from his statement mentioned in a BBC News article include statements on Darfur and on the Olympics.

Not entering Darfur "partly not to send troops into another Muslim country", my arse. It’s because there’s no ******* oil there so he’s not bothered about it. If he’s not interested in invading another Muslim country when why is there such tension surrounding the possibility of them storming into Iran? Lying bastard.

As to him telling the Chinese Prime Minister that China could be doing more to help the problems in Darfur… People in glass houses, George – you dozy ****.

******* hurry up January when they get rid of this pathetic puppet.

Barrymore’s as funny as plague

I was marginally amused to find out that the father of the guy found dead in Michael Barrymore’s pool was to hold a "silent protest" at his new show. Ignoring Sky News’ marginal twisting of the facts for a better All Words Capitalised As They Always Do Headline ("front row" means the row at the front – the man had second row tickets), it still doesn’t seem surprising that anyone would attend a Michael Barrymore show and not laugh. It’s not like he’s actually funny or anything.

I mean, I can’t blame Mr Lubbock for being upset. If your son had ended up in a small-scale version of post-Katrina New Orleans (only with white people and additional anal tearing) you’d be upset as well. However, I don’t see how effectively putting cash into the man you despise’s pocket is going to help. Surely putting the money towards a hitman would be a better plan?

Hell, if he wants to go for a bulk-buy discount, add the Spice Girls to the hit list and I’ll chip in a few quid as well. Oh, and Noel Edmonds.

In the news today…

Two stories caught my eye today. The first is about a teacher who was given a suspended sentence some time ago for daring to confront a gang of youths who had harassed her and her family for months on end. She fired a couple of shots into the air with a pellet gun, they reported her to the police and she was given 6 months. This was commuted on appeal to a 12- month suspended sentence. Her crime was worded as "possessing a firearm with intent to cause fear of violence, and affray".

Well… yes. Can you blame her? Legal resorts failed to get her anywhere as the crimes committed against her were regarded as "low priority crime". Sure, one incident of a retard spray-painting your garden wall is low priority. But all the time? Plus further vandalism, trespass, threats (verbal and physical), burglary… At what point to several small crimes amount to a much larger one?

Don’t get me wrong. I read enough police blogs to know that the boys in blue have their hands tied by ridiculous targets, legislation and so forth. I’m sure that most officers would gladly round up the scum who were doing this, pop them into a cell and beat the **** out of them. Sadly, they can’t do this. Procedures must be followed. Social workers must be brought in if any of the poor darlings may have been spanked as a child. Twenty pieces of paperwork must be filled in for each individual arrested.

You can argue that this woman should not have gone running around with a firearm. I’d say that it shouldn’t have got so far that she snapped and ended up doing just that. People have limits. I’m bloody glad I’ve got very high limits, or I could have done something as bad or worse to the **** I used to live next door to (dig through the archives about 2 1/2 years). And she was committed of basically trying to scare people – to make them frightened that they may get hurt. Not of actually intending to hurt them. Hardly a major crime in my eyes, and peanuts compared to what she’d been through.

I’m just glad to read that she got so many letters of support. If I knew her address I’d send her one as well. She didn’t fail – the system failed her.

On a lighter note, some silly bitch in Darlington tattooed her boyfriend’s nickname on her belly, in Chinese, as a sign of her undying love. Of course, they split up. I’m trying to figure out from the report if she’s 19 now, or was 19 when she got the tattoo done, in which case I’m surprised the tattooist hasn’t been charged as she’d have been under 18 at the time. Of course, she’d likely have had 25 boyfriend and two pregnancies by then. It is Darlington after all.

Anyway, his nickname was "Roo". One syllable or symbol. She has three Chinese characters on her belly. This means three syllables. And apparently it translates as "supermarket".

You stupid cow. Mind, being from Darlo she’s bound to be off to a bad start as far as entrance to MENSA (or indeed, nursery school) is concerned.